ADHD - Child - Father

Investigating the Father-Child Relationship

/in /by

Mothers often comment that their child with ADHD behaves better with his/her father. Children with ADHD do tend to be less negative and more likely to stay on task when with their fathers rather than with their mothers. The cause of this interaction is unclear but may be due to a few explanations.
Oftentimes, the mother stays at home more than the father, resulting in the mother assuming the role of disciplinarian. Of course the child will have a more stressed relationship with the disciplinarian of the household. Another explanation resides in the manner in which males and females communicate disapproval. Mothers are more likely to express disapproval of her child’s actions through verbal explanations, which may not resonate with children whose ADHD limits their language skills.  Fathers, on the other hand, are more apt to express disapproval with immediate punishment and fewer verbal explanations, which may lead to better parent-child compliance. Also, the typically larger and more imposing size of the father may elicit better behavior from a child.
Due to this difference in behavior, many fathers believe that the mothers have a problem with disciplining the child as apposed to the child having disciplinary problems. Usually, if the father begins to take responsibility for the daily management of the child, the family begins to realize that the issue of noncompliance is not directed toward one specific parent or gender.

Contact Dr. Gordon for help with your ADHD. We have treatment and solutions available online, by phone, and in our offices.

Get Started

written by:
 Brianna Malinowski, 
Jay Gordon, Ph.D

Barkley, R. A. (2013). Taking Charge of ADHD: The Complete, Authoritative Guide for Parents. New York, NY: Guilford Publications.
Image retrieved from: http://cliparts.co/father-and-child-images on Sept. 9, 2015

adhd diagnosis

“Growing Out” of ADHD?

/in /by

About 10-15% of children with ADHD continue to have ADHD as an adult. Previously, it was believed that most of these children “grow out” of ADHD as their brains further develop into adulthood. As adults, these people who used to have ADHD no longer meet the criteria for adult ADHD.
New research finds that, although adults who had ADHD as children no longer have symptoms that meet the criteria for ADHD, they still have differences in brain structure. A study examined the memory function and brain size of 20-24 year olds who had been diagnosed with ADHD by the age of 16. Some of these participants still experienced symptoms of ADHD, while some were free from symptoms. Even those participants who no longer met the criteria for ADHD had lower brain volume and poorer memory function than a control group of young adults who had never received an ADHD diagnosis.
This study suggests that a diagnosis of ADHD may go beyond the criteria listed in the DSM-V. Even when a person has “grown out” of ADHD and does not have readily noticeable symptoms, ADHD may affect various cognitive functions and memory. The extent to which lower memory functioning affects the lives of those who have (or had) ADHD is still in question and is next for researchers to tackle.

Contact Dr. Gordon for help with your ADHD. We have treatment and solutions available online, by phone, and in our offices.

Get Started

written by:
 Brianna Malinowski, 
Jay Gordon, Ph.D

Differences in brain structure and memory suggest adolescents may not ‘grow out of’ ADHD | University of Cambridge. (2015, August 27). Retrieved from http://www.cam.ac.uk/research/news/differences-in-brain-structure-and-memory-suggest-adolescents-may-not-grow-out-of-adhd on 3 September 2015.

Photo retrieved from: http://www.clipartbest.com/cliparts/4ib/KLp/4ibKLpebT.svg on 4 Sept. 2015.

children with ADHD

Talking to the Teacher

/in /by

School is overwhelming with distractions for children with ADHD. Your child’s teacher is most likely not specially trained in assisting children with ADHD. Here are some ideas that you, as a parent, can communicate to your child’s teacher in order to help them succeed:

  1. Ask the teacher for an extra set of textbooks to be kept at home. Despite effort to remember, many distractible students forget to bring home their proper materials.
  2. Encourage the teacher to seat your child near the front and center of the classroom. This should not be done in an embarrassing or punishing way. Instead, seat him/her in the front using a “random” seat assignment. This way, there are not many students in front of the child to distract him/her.
  3. Communicate your child’s strengths to the teacher. If your child learns better by creating mnemonics or rhymes or by visual learning, the teacher may be able to tweak the lesson to help.
  4. Ask for extra feedback on your child’s behavior. Feedback should be given to the student and to the parent via email or take-home messages. Remind the teacher that children with ADHD especially need to celebrate their progress often.
  5. Tell the teacher that directions should be repeated and written for your child. Oftentimes, when the directions are stated once, they go in one ear and out the other. Repeating gives your child a second chance to catch the directions. Writing directions on the board or assignment gives your child the opportunity to look back at the directions as much as needed.
  6. Encourage the teacher to ask you for help! Express to the teacher that you realize that he or she is not an expert on ADHD. The teacher may have questions for you or for your child about what he or she can do to help. Also, if a school psychologist or guidance counselor is available, remind the teacher that help can be obtained from these resources as well.
  7. Ask if your child can share notes with another student. Taking notes quickly is difficult for students with ADHD. By sharing notes, your child can get the information that he/she missed during class.
  8. Ask for extra time on tests and quizzes. Even if your child does not meet the legal criteria for receiving extra time, the teacher may be willing to provide it regardless.
  9. Ask the teacher to set up a buddy system in which each student has a few phone numbers of classmates in the case of forgotten homework assignments.

Remember that the more you help the teacher understand your child, the more he/she can help your child!
Contact Dr. Gordon for help with your ADHD. We have treatment and solutions available online, by phone, and in our offices.

Get Started

written by:
 Brianna Malinowski, 
Jay Gordon, Ph.D

Bernstein, J. (2007). 10 days to a less distracted child: The breakthrough program that gets your kids to listen, learn, focus, and behave. New York: Marlowe & Company.

Photo retrieved from: http://www.longislandeyedoctor.com/2014/04/vision-therapy-kids-failing-school/ on Aug. 24, 2015

parenting tips -adhd coaching

Consequences of an Overreacting Parent

/in /by

Do you overreact to your child with ADHD?

  • Yelling at your child
  • Mocking or embarrassing your child
  • Giving harsh or sudden punishments
  • Ignoring your child
  • Lecturing your child
  • Telling your child that he/she will not succeed in life
  • Calling your child names (brat, pest, etc.)

If you do any of the above, you may be overreacting to your child’s behavior. This does not mean that you are the cause of his/her behavior or that your parenting is bad; however, it may mean that you are setting your child up for underachievement.

Effects of Overreacting:

Overreacting makes your child feel hopeless. Children who are highly distractible do not improve their behavior when they feel pressure from their parents. Feeling hopeless also leads to lack of motivation. Children may not understand the concept of “hopelessness” and may instead describe this feeling as being tired, bored, or mad. Overreacting can also make your child feel unloved. Children may think that you no longer believe in them or that you care more about the work they get done than about them. Of course, it is your love that is driving these overreactions, but a child does not view it this way. Reacting strongly can also teach your children to react strongly as well. If you misbehave as a parent, children notice this hypocrisy and learn to overreact as well.

Contact Dr. Gordon for help with your ADHD. We have treatment and solutions available online, by phone, and in our offices.

Get Started

written by:
 Brianna Malinowski, 
Jay Gordon, Ph.D

Bernstein, J. (2007). 10 days to a less distracted child: The breakthrough program that gets your kids to listen, learn, focus, and behave. New York: Marlowe & Company.
Photo retrieved from: http://www.thestar.com/life/2013/08/19/being_controlled_by_husbands_anger_no_help_to_woman_fighting_cancer_ellie.html on Aug. 23, 2015

ADHD diagnosis

ADHD Coaching vs. ADHD Therapy

/in /by

Coaching is used at Dr. Gordon’s office to help manage ADHD. ADHD Coaching is similar to therapy in many ways. Both are centered around having regular conversations and open-ended questions with the client. Both also support the client through a situation by utilizing the client’s strengths and providing a trusting partnership. However, there are some important differences between coaching and therapy.

Coaching

Therapy
Clients improve through goal-setting, actions, and gaining self-awareness. Clients improve through self-understanding, acceptance, and occasionally through goal-setting.
Works with clients whose mental health issues are under control. Works with clients in an attempt to better manage their mental health.
Focus is on issues beyond mental health Focus is on mental health
Does not make a diagnosis Diagnoses and treats
Works mainly with external issues (organization, time management) Works mainly with internal issues (emotions)

If a client desires coaching but does not have his/her mental health under control, it is recommended that he/she first seeks therapy. This is because the person may lack the psychological capacity to be successful with coaching.

Contact Dr. Gordon for help with your ADHD. We have treatment and solutions available online, by phone, and in our offices.

Get Started

written by:
 Brianna Malinowski, 
Jay Gordon, Ph.D

Sleeper-Triplett, J. (2010). Empowering youth with ADHD: Your guide to coaching adolescents and young adults for coaches, parents, and professionals. Plantation, Fla: Specialty Press, Inc.

 

ADHD Medication

Keep Track of ADHD Medication

/in /by

When beginning a new ADHD medication or a different dosage of medication, it can be difficult to notice changes unless you actively think of them. Using the chart below can help keep track of how your ADHD medication is working and/or giving you side effects.

Medication name:                               Dose:
ADHD Symptom

Day 1

Day 2

Day 3

Day 4
Impulsivity Rating (1-3) Rating (1-3) Rating (1-3) Rating (1-3)
Distractibility
Procrastination
Trouble Focusing
Restlessness
Rating: 1- not improved, 2-slightly improved, 3-significantly improved

Contact Dr. Gordon for help with your ADHD. We have treatment and solutions available online, by phone, and in our offices.

Get Started

written by:
 Brianna Malinowski, 
Jay Gordon, Ph.D

Ratey, N. A. (2008). The disorganized mind: Coaching your ADHD brain to take control of your time, tasks, and talents. New York: St. Martin’s Griffin.

adhd coaching

Organization Tips

/in /by

For young people, staying organized in school is essential. But things can easily get disorganized with papers from different classes, take-home notices, homework, and trash. Here are some tips for keeping organized for school and home:

  • Label everything! Label each notebook and textbook with the subject name. Use color-coding to further distinguish different school materials. A green science notebook should match a green book cover, etc. Also include the student’s name in case of losing the items.
  • Do a daily 15-minute cleanup of the child’s room, work, and play area. Limiting the time will keep from overwhelming the child and will also prevent a massive and lengthy cleanup at the end of the week or month.
  • The child should dump his/her entire backpack onto the floor or table in the same spot every day. This helps them find “lost” objects and papers and allows them to sort through their papers and trash from school.
  • Sort through lose papers stuffed into notebooks and textbooks. Should the papers be thrown out? Should they be hole-punched and put into a binder? A binder may be better than a folder as the papers can be easily flipped through and organized into sections.
  • Create a place for important papers. Use a labeled box or office paper trays to save a place for completed tests until they are no longer needed.
  • At the end of the school day, the child should look at his/her planner to make sure that the correct books and papers are brought home for homework and studying.

 

Contact Dr. Gordon for help with your ADHD. We have treatment and solutions available online, by phone, and in our offices.

Get Started

written by:
 Brianna Malinowski, 
Jay Gordon, Ph.D

Sleeper-Triplett, J. (2010). Empowering youth with ADHD: Your guide to coaching adolescents and young adults for coaches, parents, and professionals. Plantation, Fla: Specialty Press, Inc.

adhd coaching improving adhd with ANSWER

Finding the A-N-S-W-E-R

/in /by

Accept that you have ADHD and the challenges that come with it. Realize that, as much as you may want it to, your ADHD will not simply disappear. Get to know your ADHD and which problems affect your life the greatest. Your problems must be recognized before they can be helped.

Narrow your focus and work on improving only one or two problems at a time. Narrow your focus by asking yourself: which issues affect my life most often? Remember that trying to tackle too many problems at once is overwhelming and likely to not work well.

Strategize about solving your one or two selected difficulties. There is no one method that will help every person with ADHD. Try to find your own strategy that works for you and realize that finding a good strategy may take some time. Don’t just focus on your weaknesses that need changing; focus on your strengths that can lead to a successful strategy!

Work through your strategy. Commit 100% to your chosen strategy and keep up your effort! This means overcoming obstacles, failures, and frustrations that come with any life change.

Evaluate your plan and judge how well your strategy is working. Perhaps, the strategy is not working as planned. In this case, you must ask yourself which parts of the plan are not working and which parts are working. Modify your strategy according to your answers to these questions.

Repeat your strategy that has been working.  ADHD is a problem that follows you throughout a lifetime, so your strategies may need to be implemented for a long time as well. After reaching success, the last thing you want is to go back to your old ways.

Of course, the A-N-S-W-E-R method of improving ADHD is easier said than done, which is where ADHD coaching is a huge help.

Contact Dr. Gordon for help with your ADHD. We have treatment and solutions available online, by phone, and in our offices.

Get Started

written by:
 Brianna Malinowski, 
Jay Gordon, Ph.D

Ratey, N. A. (2008). The disorganized mind: Coaching your ADHD brain to take control of your time, tasks, and talents. New York: St. Martin’s Griffin.

 

ADHD diagnosis

How does ADHD Coaching Help?

/in /by

Create “Good Stress”
People with ADHD often require a feeling of stress in order to achieve goals. This is because the stress and sense of urgency of a deadline forces them to complete tasks. For this reason, ADHD coaching helps clients create their own “good stress.” By creating deadlines, schedules, and check-ins, clients learn to manipulate their stress level in order to finish tasks.

Decrease Negativity
A person with ADHD may feel guilty and ashamed of the difficulty they cause to themselves and others. Many people live with ADHD as their main identity. Coaching helps to rid of this negative identity. Always remember: you are NOT your ADHD.

Stay Motivated
It is a myth that people with ADHD lack motivation. Coaching helps people to realize their motivation and past success. This leads to higher self-confidence and continued success.

Know Yourself and Make Changes
An important factor in coaching is to teach clients to recognize their own behavior. With ADHD, clients must recognize their actions in order to notice when they are getting off track. Self-monitoring also helps to tune out distractions and increase attention.

Among other benefits, ADHD coaching helps to strengthen time management and organizational skills as well as build self-esteem and acceptance.

Contact Dr. Gordon for help with your ADHD. We have treatment and solutions available online, by phone, and in our offices.

Get Started

written by:
 Brianna Malinowski, 
Jay Gordon, Ph.D

Ratey, N. A. (2008). The disorganized mind: Coaching your ADHD brain to take control of your time, tasks, and talents. New York: St. Martin’s Griffin.

ADHD diagnosis

ADHD Symptoms Depend on the Situation

/in /by

Children with ADHD tend to behave better under these certain circumstances:

1. New and unfamiliar settings. When situations are exciting and new, children with ADHD behave better. This is because boredom, which causes a decrease in behavior control, has not set in. For example, during the first exciting days at school with a new teacher and a new classroom, children with ADHD behave much better than when the school year becomes routine. Boredom during the school day can be reduced by using bright and colorful school materials and textbooks, which may help children with ADHD work better in school.
2. Immediate rewards for behavior. Children with ADHD pay better attention to tasks in which they are given immediate and frequent feedback and rewards.
3. One-on-one attention. Children with ADHD tend to behave better when they interact individually with others. For example, the child may seem less active and impulsive during one-on-one meetings with grandparents or friends. This also means that group situations are a difficult environment for children with ADHD.
4. Tasks in the morning. Children with ADHD often work better in school and on homework in the morning than they do later in the day. Unless a child is on extended-release medication, homework may be completed more efficiently in the morning than in the evening.

Contact Dr. Gordon for help with your ADHD. We have treatment and solutions available online, by phone, and in our offices.

Get Started

written by:
 Brianna Malinowski, 
Jay Gordon, Ph.D

Barkley, R. A. (2013). Taking charge of ADHD: The complete, authoritative guide for parents (3rd ed.). New York: The Guilford Press.